By Mary

Ah, marriage. That blessed union where two souls come together to build a life of sanctity, love, and all that good stuff. It’s the kind of partnership that makes you think of Ruth and Boaz, you know? Now, here’s a head-scratcher: why do some blissfully married folks, who could very well teach a doctoral course in matrimony, never utter those three magic words ‘I love you’ to each other? Well, sit tight. I’ll give you some insights that’ll surprise you, tickle your funny bone, and maybe, just maybe, make you reevaluate how you see this age-old romantic expression. By the way, if you think you already know the answer, I dare you not to skip to the end. Go on, I dare ya!

Actions Speak Louder than Words

Let’s talk about my Uncle Joe and Aunt Betty. Forty-five beautiful years, folks. And you know what? I don’t think I ever heard Uncle Joe say ‘I love you’ to Aunt Betty. Instead, he showed his love by fixing stuff around the house, making sure her car was in tip-top shape, and keeping the yard neat. Aunt Betty, bless her heart, would always whip up his favorite meal—chicken pot pie—every Sunday. Now, if that ain’t love, I don’t know what is!

Sometimes it’s the little things. Holding each other’s hands during the evening prayer, or sharing a cup of coffee over morning devotions. These silent acts can often carry the weight of a thousand ‘I love you’s.’ So the next time you see your spouse taking out the trash or washing the dishes, don’t take it lightly. That right there is a declaration of love.

The Power of Tradition

Another factor to consider is tradition. Many of the folks in our generation, raised by parents who survived either the Depression or WWII, grew up in homes where love was understood, not necessarily spoken aloud. Dad worked long hours, Mom kept the home fires burning, and both did their best to give their kids a good, godly upbringing. They weren’t prone to gushing affection in public or even at home. Instead, their love was a given, as certain as the rising sun.

My own parents, God rest their souls, rarely verbalized their love for each other. But every Sunday, my father would drive out to the fields, pick the freshest wildflowers, and bring them home for my mother. This was their unspoken language of love. We may not realize it, but many of us carry these traditions into our relationships, embedding them in the daily routines that make up the fabric of our lives.

A Break from the Modern Hustle and Bustle

Now, let’s get down to brass tacks—our modern world puts a lot of stock in verbal affirmation. ‘Say the words,’ they tell us, as if love is some fragile thing that’ll crumble without constant validation. But think back with me for a moment. Did Abraham and Sarah go around saying ‘I love you’ every five minutes? No, and their love endured through famine, trials, and even a God-given prophecy! Maybe saying ‘I love you’ all the time is a modern twist we don’t necessarily need. What we do need are the sacred acts that symbolize our deeper commitments.

The next time you feel a little insecure because your partner didn’t say those words, please take a big deep breath. Look at the bigger picture: the grocery trips, the oil changes, the way he looks at you like you’re the only girl in the world during church. These acts of love, steeped in faith and tradition, are rock-solid and enduring.

Drawing the Line in Humor

If you’re still with me, let’s spice things up with a bit of humor. There’s this old joke that folks in our neck of the woods often share: A wife says to her husband, ‘You never tell me you love me anymore!’ He looks at her and says, ‘I told you I loved you when we got married. If anything changes, I’ll let you know.’ Now, we all giggle because there’s a nugget of truth in that. Men, especially our generation’s men, aren’t always the most eloquent. But when they love you, they sure do live it in their actions.

My husband, bless his soul, is as quiet as a church mouse when it comes to saying ‘I love you,’ but he makes sure I’m warm in the winter, protected from the rain with a brand-new umbrella, and always keeps an eye on my tire pressure. So to me, every action he takes is like a neon sign flashing ‘I love you, Mary!’

So, What’s Really Important?

To wrap this all up, let’s keep our perspective rooted in the things that last. Words are beautiful and have their place, no doubt. But let us not forget the acts of service, the patriarchal traditions honored by our forebears, and the many blessings we have in our daily lives that speak volumes about love. For you married folks out there, next time you don’t hear ‘I love you,’ don’t be disheartened. Remember, the love is likely there, nestled in every little act of kindness, every prayer said for you, and every moment of shared silence. God bless y’all, and keep your hearts open to the unsaid expressions of love.

Ending Thoughts

So what have we learned? That sometimes, ‘I love you’ doesn’t need to be verbalized to be real, strong, and eternal. Now, go on and cherish the love you have; after all, those daily acts and traditions may be doing all the talking for you.

-Mary