If you want your relationship to thrive and turn into a long-lasting marriage, it requires time, effort, compromise, and compatibility. Sadly, many marriages fail and end in divorce. Here are seven common reasons why relationships may fall apart.
1. Conflict and Avoidance Causes Divorce
An important part of any relationship is creating an environment where both partners feel comfortable expressing their feelings, needs, and desires. People often avoid conflict and shy away from tough conversations about their relationship. Connie Omari, Ph.D., states, “Avoiding conflict is a silent relationship killer because it prevents the opportunity for addressing conflict to take place.” When feelings are buried instead, they turn into resentment. “Not learning these skills is a sure way to kill your relationship silently,” she adds.
2. Emotions Need Validation
Another contributing factor to a high divorce rate is the inability of couples to validate or respect each other’s feelings. Dr. Omari points out that even a simple remark like “it’s not cold” can be dismissive if your partner says they are feeling chilly. “When a person feels invalidated, they often feel disconnected and unheard,” she explains. “These two characteristics combined will definitely work to deteriorate a relationship quickly.”
3. Infidelity Leads to Divorce
It’s no secret that infidelity can destroy a relationship. Alarmingly, many Americans admit to cheating for various reasons, such as feeling unloved, unheard, or invalidated. Low self-esteem and depression can also contribute to this behavior.
4. Feeling Unappreciated
Feeling unappreciated or undervalued is another major cause of divorce. This can occur in many ways, but it often happens when accomplishments are met with criticism instead of praise. For example, your partner might be busy with a work project and forget their turn to take out the trash. Instead of criticizing them, recognizing their hard work and empathizing with their situation can show appreciation. These everyday moments are opportunities to remind your partner how much you value their efforts.
5. Confusion Regarding Responsibilities
Confusion or disagreement about responsibilities can also lead to divorce. Both partners need to contribute equally to the relationship and household. It’s crucial to discuss and agree on how chores and tasks will be divided. If one person feels they are doing more, they may become resentful, thinking their partner isn’t pulling their weight.
6. Marrying Too Young
Young love can be wonderful, but marrying too young often leads to divorce. At a young age, people may not fully understand what they want in life or who they are as individuals. Over time, people change, and so can their relationships, often leading to couples growing apart.
7. Different Perspectives Cause Divorce
People change significantly from adolescence to adulthood, often evolving well into their thirties. This can include changes in religious beliefs or political views. Having similar values, goals, and perspectives is important to strengthen a relationship and ensure both partners are moving in the same direction.
