“You just let people into your disaster.”
When I was growing up, a popular saying was, “it takes a village” to raise a child. As a parent now, feeling exhausted, anxious, and often overwhelmed, I frequently wondered where that village had disappeared to. I remembered the times spent at friends’ houses, hanging out with families, or playing with neighborhood kids at the local pool. There was a sense of community, an unspoken neighborly bond.
Nowadays, those so-called “villages” seem to have vanished. But one mom on TikTok is determined to bring them back.
A mom named Casie shared with her followers that she invited someone over to her house spontaneously. Instead of frantically cleaning and preparing like many of us would, she decided to leave her home just as it was, presenting herself and her family authentically.
In her viral video, Casie explains her plan to revive the village by “acting like mom in the ‘90s.”
“Okay, I did it again, and it’s crazy. I know, I spontaneously invited someone over for dinner, even though I have not prepared. I have not cleaned. This is how we bring the village back,” she begins. “You just let people into your disaster.”
She clarifies she won’t panic clean before her company arrives. Instead, she’ll let her guests see her home for what it is: a space that is lived-in and loved.
“So other than picking up this spoon that’s been on my dog’s bed since this morning, I’m not going to clean. I’m totally not going to clean. We’re gonna chitchat inside while they play outside, and we’re just gonna have an easy spaghetti supper. No fanciness. It’s gonna be on paper plates,” she says.
Casie then shows her living room area and adds, “I’m absolutely not going to fold these blankets. I will not. Will I straighten up this table? I will not.”
“I know some of you have friends you can do this with, but if you don’t have friends like this yet, just start inviting people over randomly. This is how you bring the village back.”
Following her video’s viral success, TikTok users flooded the comments with praise for her bold choice to present her home as-is, mess included.
“It’s my FAVORITE thing to walk into a lived-in home. Love it,” one user commented.
Another shared, “My best friend and I do this and end up helping each other clean or hang laundry while the kids play. Or we sit and watch a show—depends on the day.”
Some users, however, struggled to understand Casie’s method. “I don’t understand this concept at all, like what… how?!” one user expressed.
Casie replied, “Might require going to the first video in the chain of comments/stitches, but basically I think IG aesthetic robbed millennial moms of everyday messy life besties 🤪.”
Another user admitted, “Oh my gosh, I want to… I love going to other people’s lived-in homes… But it’s so scary for me 🫣.”
Casie assured them, “Convinced it will always be so scary but sooooo worth it!”
One user asked for an update, writing, “Did it work?”
“Yes!! Great convos, and I think we all needed the girl time, even as three grown-ass adults 🤪😆,” Casie replied.
There’s something truly valuable about being genuine and presenting oneself as they are, mess and all. It seems Casie may be onto something.